Ghost? The results are in! UPDATED!

Remember when I posted that picture and I asked for your help to rationalize away something I feared and didn’t understand? Well, you did it! No, strike that—WE did it! (Seeing as I was responsible for 40% of the votes.) Here are the results of the voting:

• Strange Reports: 1 vote
• A Ghost: 1 vote
• Other: 3 VOTES!

It’s unanimouse with 60% of the popular vote! The so-called “spirit” was actually just something else! I am relieved, because I was worried that it might have been what it was.

UPDATE!

Stop the presses! With your hand if you have to! It was a TIE! Observe the results as they were originally reported by the media:

Misleading Original Results

An obvious victor, right? “Other” is the tallest contestant by far. But… who IS this “Other”? This reporter went deep undercover to uncover the truth: “Other” is none other than a conglomerate of three other candidates (no pun intended!) conspiring together to destroy democracy! Feast on your eyes—it’s the true face of Other:

• ur mom
• it’s just a little gas.
• Stinky smell escaping when you took the sheets off the bed, perhaps.

Now take your gander to this new, updated, honest chart:

Meaningless True Results

It’s a tie! Everybody loses! Reality is ambiguous (in my room at least), and we are probably doomed. Another win for democracy!