Robot + Rape = Rape

The new WALL-E comic has surprise buttsecks:
Surprise buttsecks in WALL-E

He is obviously drunk. But that is no excuse.

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Announcing ‘The Meaning of POG!’

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
November 20, 2008
ANNOUNCING THE LAUNCH OF ‘THE MEANING OF POG’

The Internet — kristuphil, inc., the the west coast’s sixth-largest independent creator of uninteresting websites, is proud to announce the launch of The Meaning of POG, the latest in a series of soon-to-be-neglected web ventures providing unhelpful information to a world that didn’t ask for it.

The website, which explores the content and subtext of the 1990s promotional videos Searching for POG and The Legend of POG, fills a void kristuphil’s leader-in-charge saw on the Internet. Explaining his vision for the site, Renophaston said, “Some fan sites start with the fans and build, but the POG franchise has proved itself uniquely resistant to fandom. It’s been over a decade since the last video was released, and I have yet to find it mentioned on the Internet aside from the occasional “for sale” notice. So I decided to start with the site, and we’ll work on developing interest as a secondary concern somewhere down the line.”

Renophaston, creator of <em>The Meaning of POG</em>

Renophaston, creator of The Meaning of POG

The POG franchise, which released its most recent installment over 13 years ago, seems to have slipped under most peoples’ radars. Renophaston explains why he thinks this is the right time to start a community based on the unpopular series. “I think we have to face the fact that POG, the game, is probably not coming back. I personally see that as a good thing, since I think it served mostly as a distraction from the real thrust of the series. But more to the point, we cannot just wait and expect POGs to return to the forefront of public consciousness, carrying Herbie and friends along on its coattails. POG’s fifteen minutes may be over, but the Legend is forever ‘to be continued…'”

Long terms goals of the site include getting the videos released on DVD, organizing a cast reunion/reenactment/sleepover, and the release of the never-produced third entry in the series. But in the meantime, Renophaston is satisfied with the basics. “Right now we’ve just got the fundamentals like a synopsis for each video and an initial FAQ, but once this thing takes off, I’ll probably forget about it.”

The Meaning of POG can be found at themeaningofpog.wordpress.com. kristuphil, inc. is an pwned subsidiary of your mom and can be reached at their parent website, kristuphil.com or at their employee blog, kristuphil is telling you.

One of these is the best link of the week!

Solve the following for a clue:

5-3

I thought (for some reason) that I would have the strength to draw something retarded to put here since the last time I posted crappy links, but that didn’t happen.

Here are some links. (Stay until after the credits to see the Official™ Renophaston verdict on XL Band-Aid™ brand band-aids!)

  • Stairway To Heaven… as performed by The Beatles! – Oh wait—did I say The Beatles? I meant The Beatnix.
  • Blender-shaped baby-bath – Sometimes I wish there was more stuff for new parents to needlessly spend money on, and then I remember that I hate everything.
  • WGA vs. AMPTP – I present this long-form, stereotype-based joke to you in hopes that you will find its three good lines redeeming somehow. Sadly, the best line is at the very end!

Last week, I promised I’d tell you about my experience with XL Band-Aid™ brand band-aids, so here goes:

They were fine.

Hey Ste, I figured maybe when you get home for the holidays, we should do something. Like, this one idea I had was we could make a porno version of Tim & Eric Awesome Show Great Job! and call it Tim & Eric Awesome Choad Blow Job! Then we could put it on YouTube and make fun of the comments it gets. Or if that sounds too gay, I could watch you and Fil play Mario Dance Dance Revolution. Oh yeah: I actually played Gears of War co-op with Mikey when he was here and he was a lot better than me. His patience with me bordered on condescension. I cannot play shooters with those controls. If I had to score my performance, I would give it a bleed out of ass.

Answer: Link #2.

Link this, week!

Quickly this week, because those guys are after me and they’re almost through the door!

Nevermind, the guys left. I was probably dreaming it anyway.

I’d write more, but Parvo cut my knife open with a hand and I bled out completely. Later, I’ll post about my experiences with XL Band-Aid™ brand band-aids!

Kris has links in his week

This week we have links from your mom’s butt:

Well, that’s it for this week. Thanks for visiting!

Kris’s Wink Leaks

This week my links are here:

These are some pretty good links, I think. I’m happy with them.

Linking Is for the Week

I’m lazy. Here’s some links:

Also, here; I made this for you:

A limerick about a haiku
(except it’s not actually lewd)
  Five-seven-five
  over three lines.
To a season you ought to allude.

Well. That was boring.