Announcing ‘The Meaning of POG!’

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
November 20, 2008
ANNOUNCING THE LAUNCH OF ‘THE MEANING OF POG’

The Internet — kristuphil, inc., the the west coast’s sixth-largest independent creator of uninteresting websites, is proud to announce the launch of The Meaning of POG, the latest in a series of soon-to-be-neglected web ventures providing unhelpful information to a world that didn’t ask for it.

The website, which explores the content and subtext of the 1990s promotional videos Searching for POG and The Legend of POG, fills a void kristuphil’s leader-in-charge saw on the Internet. Explaining his vision for the site, Renophaston said, “Some fan sites start with the fans and build, but the POG franchise has proved itself uniquely resistant to fandom. It’s been over a decade since the last video was released, and I have yet to find it mentioned on the Internet aside from the occasional “for sale” notice. So I decided to start with the site, and we’ll work on developing interest as a secondary concern somewhere down the line.”

Renophaston, creator of The Meaning of POG

The POG franchise, which released its most recent installment over 13 years ago, seems to have slipped under most peoples’ radars. Renophaston explains why he thinks this is the right time to start a community based on the unpopular series. “I think we have to face the fact that POG, the game, is probably not coming back. I personally see that as a good thing, since I think it served mostly as a distraction from the real thrust of the series. But more to the point, we cannot just wait and expect POGs to return to the forefront of public consciousness, carrying Herbie and friends along on its coattails. POG’s fifteen minutes may be over, but the Legend is forever ‘to be continued…’”

Long terms goals of the site include getting the videos released on DVD, organizing a cast reunion/reenactment/sleepover, and the release of the never-produced third entry in the series. But in the meantime, Renophaston is satisfied with the basics. “Right now we’ve just got the fundamentals like a synopsis for each video and an initial FAQ, but once this thing takes off, I’ll probably forget about it.”

The Meaning of POG can be found at themeaningofpog.wordpress.com. kristuphil, inc. is an pwned subsidiary of your mom and can be reached at their parent website, kristuphil.com or at their employee blog, kristuphil is telling you.

Ghost? The results are in! UPDATED!

Remember when I posted that picture and I asked for your help to rationalize away something I feared and didn’t understand? Well, you did it! No, strike that—WE did it! (Seeing as I was responsible for 40% of the votes.) Here are the results of the voting:

• Strange Reports: 1 vote
• A Ghost: 1 vote
• Other: 3 VOTES!

It’s unanimouse with 60% of the popular vote! The so-called “spirit” was actually just something else! I am relieved, because I was worried that it might have been what it was.

UPDATE!

Stop the presses! With your hand if you have to! It was a TIE! Observe the results as they were originally reported by the media:

Misleading Original Results

An obvious victor, right? “Other” is the tallest contestant by far. But… who IS this “Other”? This reporter went deep undercover to uncover the truth: “Other” is none other than a conglomerate of three other candidates (no pun intended!) conspiring together to destroy democracy! Feast on your eyes—it’s the true face of Other:

• ur mom
• it’s just a little gas.
• Stinky smell escaping when you took the sheets off the bed, perhaps.

Now take your gander to this new, updated, honest chart:

Meaningless True Results

It’s a tie! Everybody loses! Reality is ambiguous (in my room at least), and we are probably doomed. Another win for democracy!

Disappointment.

I am disappointed in us.  I thought we could keep a fair and balanced mindset through this election, but unfortunately the voters went to the polls with an obvious bias toward the better candidate.  Where is the level playing field?  Where is the bipartisanship?  This is not fairness, Amerikkka.  A person’s chance at the presidency should not be effected by his political beliefs.  That is PREJUDICE.

Voting is beyond good and evil. Election Day should be about feeling good about yourself for being right about things you don’t understand, not about picking favorites. I think we owe John McCain an apology. This was an important race, and it deserved to be decided by statistical error or divine intervention like when I was a kid.